Dear left knee,
You’ve put me in an incredibly awkward position. For the past week, I’ve been forced to hobble around, dragging your uncooperative ass all around New England. We’ve limped around Boston. You’ve pained me on bike rides to Cambridge. Hell, you even put up a fight as we traveled with the Pow Arrangers and saw the beauty of northern Vermont. What gives?
Seriously, you’ve caused me nothing but trouble this week. And yet… I can’t quit you. I don’t know why, but I just can’t let you go. No matter how far you stretch our relationship, something always brings me back to you. It’s like we’re attached at the hip.
So here’s the plan. I’m going to do whatever I can to salvage our relationship. Maybe we can take a long bath? If it’ll make you feel better, do you want me to do drugs with you (only over the counter stuff, I don’t want to see a doctor if we don’t have to). Please don’t fight me on this. I’ll even spend an entire day in bed lying in bed with you. You don’t like being tied up, but sometimes we have to try new things in order to rekindle what we once had.
We’ve had a good run so far. I don’t want to give up on you just yet.
Consider yourself on notice.