Lords of Salem- But…Why the Goat?

Modern horror shouldn’t be glossy and pretty; sometimes the truly terrifying comes from somewhere ugly and strange. The last few decent horror films I’ve seen fall into this category, and typically I can count on Rob Zombie to do the same.

Rob Zombie has a precarious repertoire. He’s made five films now- 2 are pretty damn good, one is ok, and two are crap. I’ll let you work out the details yourself. With a 3-2 record, it’s hard to say if the man is a talented director or a hack with some fluke success.

Lords of Salem falls firmly in the crap category. It has only enough decent visual material to make a creepy, trippy music video. Generally the movie functions with the level of narrative cohesion and logic of a music video- strange images flow together in a series of dreams and occasionally reality, but it’s hard to differentiate the two. Frankly, it wouldn’t change a thing to know the difference. It has a solid soundtrack and certainly makes good use of its creepy, 3-note theme song. So next time, stick to a 5 minute format, because 1.5 hours is way too much nothingness to sit through.

This movie isn’t any of the good things Zombie’s previous films were- it’s wimpy and hesitant in its approach and not nearly as courageously stylistic as his first two movies. Nor does it reach the demented heights of Zombie’s dark and twisted mind. I know there’s some good ideas in there, and I love that he’s out there trying to make something different. But it’s his ability to commit to something insane and just push the boundaries of his ideas that makes his work worth watching. Lords of Salem doesn’t do this. It sits at a safe distance from originality and wallows in its own depressingly dull, cliched storyline full of laughable dialogue and melodramatic performances.

Intrigued? Read my entire review here: http://loganreviews.blogspot.com/2013/04/lords-of-salem-butwhy-goat.html

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